


discourse

by badbadnotgood



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, pinof 10, sharing a bed but it's sharing a bath
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-14 13:00:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16913310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/badbadnotgood/pseuds/badbadnotgood
Summary: Dan’s standing with his hands on his hips. “Right then, Philly. Hop in.”“You’re going in first because I’m filming. Mind your freakishly large duck.”A conversation in the bathtub.





	discourse

Dan’s standing with his hands on his hips. “Right then, Philly. Hop in.”

“You’re going in first because I’m filming. Mind your freakishly large duck.”

Dan steps over the side of the bath and Phil witnesses him narrowly avoid slipping. For God’s sake, his own socks are a hazard.

Phil climbs in next and pushes at Dan’s legs so he can sit. Like, it’s a big bath. A good size. Not big enough for two six-feet men, however.

“I feel claustrophobic already,” Dan says. “And my ass is cold from the ceramic.”

“Your ass is always cold, do something about it.”

“Oh, I’ll just get some fat on there, won’t I?”

“Your ass is plenty fat.”

“Is this you flirting with me, Phillip?”

“I like flirting. And I’m stuck with you ‘til the end of my days, so I will flirt however much I like.”

Phil’s about to angle the camera to get them both in when Dan starts talking again.

“This is quite a throwback for me,” Dan muses. “Did you ever go to the bathroom at house parties and find, like, three girls just chilling in the tub?”

Phil turns his head to frown at him. “What sort of parties were you attending without me?!”

“Only the diabolical ones where everyone was sixteen and the person who lived there was feeding everyone straight vodka.

Seriously, was that not a thing for you? You get drunk, you go lay in an empty bath, fully clothed. It’s sobering.”

Phil really can’t imagine climbing the stairs of a stranger’s house, pissed off his face, to go lay unflatteringly in their bathtub.

“If I’ve ever ended up in the bath when pissed, I don’t remember it.”

“You always remember the bath part of the night.”

“I’m really offended that you never suggested we go sit in the bath at house parties, now. What, was I not good enough?”

Dan _laughs_ at him.

“Phil, I don’t know if you remember who I was at eighteen, but I definitely wasn’t someone who would ask you, Phil Lester, to sit in the bath with me. Even after all that Malibu.”

“I bet you wanted to.”

“Oh yeah,” Dan snorts. “That was always on my mind whenever we were together. _God, I wish Phil would sit in the fucking bath with me, so I know it’s real_.”

“Well, we’re here now,” Phil says, underwhelmed.

“Yes, and you’re welcome for the present that is my presence. Now, do capture this iconic moment for everyone.”

“We should say ‘now what’ at the same time, you know, for continuity editing purposes,” Phil says proudly.

“Okay. You better start recording before the blood circulation in my legs stops.”


End file.
